Major Event Log II

4 Dec, Sunday

1. 6:00 am: Slight cramp, went to poo, then shortly after - "show".
2. 6:15 am: can't sleep, ate light breakfast, bathe, to prepare to go hospital any time. 
3. 7:40 am: 1st contraction. poo again. (seems like the contractions is good for pooing!)
4. 8:40 am: 2nd contraction, another "show". decided to wait for more contractions.
5. 8:45 am: on PC, started blogging to relieve some tension. Read to distract myself.
6. 9:00 am: Mucous Plug is out. To continue monitor for more contractions. On music.
7. 9.15 am: Hubby back from supermarket. Ate carrot cake.
8. 10:00 am: 2-3 contractions- irregular. each lasted around for 1 min. Felt butterflies in my stomach (like the nervous feeling you had when you for your 1st school exams or whatever test you might be going...) Completed blogging. 
9. Stayed at home the whole day ....

5 Dec, Monday

1. 12:00 am+: to hospital
2. 1:00 am+: Nurse started monitoring, CTG on.
3. 3:00 am+: CTG off around, advise to sleep till 5 am+
4. 5:00 am+: CTG on again
5. 7:00 am+: Doc came and check, options given. Thinking of going back home and come back on 7 Dec or when contractions become stronger but not allowed to go back home. Regretted coming earlier. (cos doc advised me to come for induction on 6 Dec 12 am)
6. 8:00 am+: Move to room to check to rest and ponder on options.
7. Options: 1. C-Section immediately, 2. Put on Prostaglandin pills for dilation of cervix (max up to 4 pills) - if all pills fail, then C-section.
8. After Lunch: Put on 1st pill. Contractions getting more gradually but still irregular.
9. After Dinner: Put on 2nd pill. Contractions getting more intense after midnight.

6 Dec, Tuesday

1. 1:00 - 5:00 am: Quite bearable until 3:00 am when the contractions every 10 mins and then every 5 mins. hub suggested a hot shower to lessen the pain, and apparently it worked. I went on my knees on all fours with some pillows supporting my arms on the floor. Hub reminded me again on my breathing techniques and visualisation. I kept visualising I am floating in the air tied up to a huge balloon and it is carrying me high up and away from the pain ...... as the contractions intensify at my 8th count, I raised up my hands like a conductor in front of an orchestra which helped to alleviate the pain and breathe in deeply. Hub kept stroking my hands to soothe me while I concentrate on the breathing techniques. At one point, I felt like I am getting used to the pain, hub kept repeating "yes, you love contractions as they are helping you to birth the baby...yes you are loving it..." I just repeat whatever my hub said like a mantra and this continue...
2. Contractions intensify....coming in waves (or think Tsunami?) where there is a peak- where the pain is the greatest and as each wave travel, you can feel the pressure pressing against your lower back, squeezing both your tummy and lower back, as if your tummy is like a packet of chilli sauce, and someone is trying to squeeze through last bits of the chilli sauce. Through the CTG machine, hub is predict the next peak, and alerted me while I make my own breathing preparations and this went on ....
3. Cervix dilated to 5cm. (yes, I am half way there!) Pethidine was injected at my thigh to lessen the pain  and I continue with my 'contractions journey'.......
4. 8:00 am+:  doc broke my waterbag to induce labour; put on the drip to intensify the contractions further. ( Just another 4-5 hours more, it would be 10 cm, hang in there!) 
5. 11:00 am+ (the nurse increase the level of drip gradually throughout): Nurse checked and I have only dilated by 1 more cm. There is not much progress. Then suddenly, baby's heart beat went down to 90 - Fetal distress. Doc immediately asked for a C-section. I looked at hub with the 'laughing gas' mask on my face, nodded my head and that was it. I signed the papers that I agreed with the operation and I was whisked off to the operating theatre. I remembered that I was tearing heavily, overwhelmed with frustration and self-reproach that why can't I just have a natural delivery.
6. Before I know, I woke up in a dreamy state. I heard voices telling me that the operation was over. My eyes were heavy, but I could tell what was going on...transferred from operating theatre's bed to another bed...went into a lift...voices...hustle and bustle around me...i was moving fast...transferred onto the room's bed....and then my hubby's voice telling me that the baby is fine and doing well. Drank 100ml of milk when they feed her. Must be really hungry after whole night of contractions.

After thoughts

I had no regrets as I know I have tried my best. Baby has also tried her best to pass through the pelvic cos apparently her head was elongated and reddish with a circular mark on her forehead. The head went back to normal and mark subsided after a while. 

It was an emotional ordeal for me cos I didn't expect a C-section (even though Doc did mention to me of the possibility.) I was totally distraught - never did I realise that I did not think of the worst-case scenario (from the very beginning) when I should have done in normal circumstances.

I know I should not take it to heart, it's not a big deal. The only thing I have to deal with is my expectations.

Win - Brian Mcknight

I need some inspiration and optimism.

Popped!

Finally I have delivered today.

Method: caesarean
Why caesarean: cervix dilated to 5-6cm. Can't continue further as baby is in distressed. So after 1.5 days of induction, I gotta go through caesarean.

Overwhelemed with all sorts of emotions. Gotta sort out all negativity and get over it soon. I know I am getting really emotional - my pragmatism is fighting against this emotional turmoil. My frustration is beyond what I can imagine buy I know I gotta look forward.

Hopefully it will be over soon.

Will definitely do a proper update once my condition and situation has stabilised.

P/s: after all said and done, I am glad that I did my breathing and visualisation exercises which has tide me over 1.5 days of intense contractions without epidural (which I have been working on- natural without epidural).of course, I gotta thank my hubby for being super supportive throughout the whole process.

Lost

Checked in hospital after 1 day of monitoring after show. Reality bites. Going for induction after whole night of irregular contractions.either baby's head will engage and contractions follow or c-section. Pray that everything goes well. 😔

Eliminate Fear (of child birth)

I refuse to believe that I can't go through natural delivery without epidural (although there is nothing wrong with medical interventions but it's just me. I do not want any) given that my mum can do it (cos at that time, everything was simple- and that's the key - Simple - know nothing, bring in No fear. and just do it!), so can everyone else. I mean, ok, I am stubborn but I just know I gotta do it, else I would regret. Reading hannabi's and verieying's comments are comforting and inspirational to me. 

I have been reading the following books and I highly recommend HypnoBirthing: The Mongan Method - if one doesn't have time or doesn't want to read too much, this one book is something you could count on. (Yes, it 's kindda "intensive" reading for me but I know I need to do it. I wish I could discover much earlier then again, but NOW than never.)

KEY POINTS:

Eliminate fear cos Fear > Tension > Pain (theory pioneered by Dr Grantly Dick-Read)- and the cycle goes on.

We have natural endorphins and they are 200 times (!) better than morphins as painkillers. 

"To those who say it is just not possible to birth naturally and without pain, I say, "But what if we're right? Wouldn't it be wonderful?" Lorne R.Campbell, M.D.

The power of mind: "The mind is capable of anything - because everything is in it. All the past, as well as all the future." - Joseph Conrad.

Conditioning of your body and mind = stress-free



Powerful Laws of the mind- The Laws of: --
1. Pyscho-physical : Mind > Body >Action (think:Pavolv's experiment with dogs)
2. Harmonious Attraction: Words > Feelings > Beliefs > Behaviour > Success/Failure
3. Repetition: Repeat positive thinking (see2)
4. Motivation: Focus ! (think: sportsmanship) Mind Focus on winning> No pain stimuli > No pain !

4 Techniques:

1. Breathing - 1. Sleep Breathing, 2. Slow Breathing 3. Birth Breathing
2. Relaxation - facial, body, "limp", Light Touch Massage
3. Visualisation - floating in the mist on the 7 colours of rainbow, visualise the lower circular muscles as soft, satin ribbons, flexible and totally non resistant to the draw of the upper muscles.
4. Deepening - Glove techniques, Depthometer, Time Distortion

Meditation:
1. Practice of Opening: to relax and open your body
2. Womb Breathing: energy breathing for childbirth
3. Giving and Receiving: brings healing to childbirth

......."Feel your womb and cervix holding your child. At the right time , your womb will start to felx and your cervix will begin to respond, slowly opening, progressively releasing new life. 
The baby's head will then move down through the birth canal. The pelvis will work with the womb, yielding to growth and change. 
These are the strongest muscles in your body, fully capable of birthing your baby. Relax any abdominal tension caused by anxiety. Practice relaxing the outer and inner muscles that cradle your child. Surrender into the full support of life. Trust your ability to change. Prepare to give birth to your child............"

True Stories:
1. Birthing naturally with a midwife
2. Birthing naturally with a physician
3. Birthing naturally with a doula
4. Birthing naturally unassisted
5. Birthing naturally the first time or the next time

For me, I jump into reading some stories in 2. and 5. just to give me some insight.

- Be calm and relaxed
- Do not rush immediately to hospital, check for signs.
- Birth plan (I think for me I told gynae I want natural but still "play by ear")
- Supportive husband
- Focus on your mind, instead of the pain
- Is birth like sex? (haha, it can be!)

For now, what I have to do is to believe and count on my inner strength to go through this journey smoothly.


Update - 9.15am: 
And hanaabi's comments on visualisation reassured me and of course, and as I was typing, I experienced another "show" and mucous plug (sticky red lump) is out. And this confirms that my belief in speaking to the baby and constant visualisation works in communicating with the baby. So labour is on the way-no induction *fingers-crossed*; I gotta monitor for more contractions before heading to the hospital. Yes, I will Jia You (加油) !!

You've Got A Friend - Stacy Kent

Something to perk myself up, soothe my soul for now.

Baby you are my friend. You understand mummy ya?

Weight and baby position as at 1 December 2011

I am 61.7 kg today !

Baby = 3.3 kg (base on my own est. this time -given the last few figures, cos gynae didn't mention her weight this time and I didn't bother to probe further cos I will get worried with the size for delivery.)

Position: Her head is now facing downwards (yeay!) but her head is not fully engaged. It is at station -2 so she has 2 more steps to go to station 0. :(

Pelvic Station

Dilemma:
EDD date is 5 Dec (previously was 7 Dec but gynae checked and it should be 2 days earlier) but the amniotic fluid is considerably lesser than last week. Then again, if I were to go under induction now, it is not too good as the head is not fully engaged - thus having a 50%-50% of a successful natural delivery and might need a c-section. Gynae also mentioned my pelvis might be too small for baby to come out after gynae did a vaginal examination. :( :(

I was feeling terribly frustrated and upset so I hope by speaking to baby, she understands how I feel and what I am going through. Hub has also been speaking to her too... I just gotta tell myself not to be overly negative else baby will get the negative vibes which is unhealthy.

Maternity Shoot - Photos Out !

Hello Baby !

Nice pinkie bootie for you. Do you know it's mummy's bootie once upon a time?

Mummy will love  and protect you. ; )

 Daddy will love and protect you too ; )

These are some of my personal favourites. Meanwhile, I am still pending for some editing works from DT. ^__^

Water Birth

I read about water birth few months ago from a book I borrowed from the library. However, I didn't give much thoughts but recently I chanced upon some posts from the forum.

At first I thought water birth is not available in Singapore. But water birth is actually available in Singapore, but not many people chose it cos it is not widely practiced in Singapore. One also has to understand the pros and cons of water birth.

In Singapore, the following hospitals have water birth facilities (as at of current updates):

• Mount Alvernia Hospital
• National University Hospital
• Thomson Medical Centre

One also must note that it is essential that one needs to have a doula should you wish to opt for water birth.

And it is recommended that one goes for hypnobirthing classes if you are into water birth.

The following are some of the places that teaches hypnobirthing:

1. BabyBliss
2. ParentLink
3. Four Trimesters

Channelnewsasia Article: 14 November 2009 on hypnobirthing:

Hypnobirthing ensures pain-free childbirth for some
By Venessa Lee, TODAY | Posted: 14 November 2009 1009 hrs

 SINGAPORE: Ms Regina Lim gave birth to her daughter in circumstances starkly different from most other women's.

"Actually, childbirth is not painful," said the 34-year-old, referring to her pain-free labour with Hannah and contrasting it with her experience giving birth to her two older boys, where labour had been induced.

Describing her daughter's birth at Mount Alvernia Hospital on February 20, Ms Lim said: "It's almost like your body's trying to do a split for you. If you just relax, it will gradually, over four or five hours, get into the 'split' position." Labour had been "fun", added the property analyst.

Ms Lim had practised hypnobirthing - a technique she credited with helping ensure a pain-free birth - with the help of her doula, Ms Ginny Phang. In ancient Greek, the word "doula" meant a woman of service. Today, a doula is a professional who assists women during childbirth, providing practical and emotional support.

Actress Nicole Kidman was reported to have had a doula at the birth of her daughter Sunday Rose last year.

Dr T C Chang, a consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist at Thomson Medical Centre, told Weekend Today that hypnobirthing "can reduce the need for pain relief." "Some patients will tell you ... they didn't feel pain. Others will say the pain was reduced markedly", obviating the use of pain relief during labour, according to Dr Chang, who said that 15 to 20 per cent of his patients use doulas.

Hypnobirthing, which can comprise visual and auditory cues, is "a mind-body technique to teach women to relax during labour," said Ms Phang, who owns FourTrimesters, a firm that offers doula services.

According to another doula, Ms Kiki Porter Wolff, hypnobirthing "is mind over matter, the mind controls how the body reacts. It won't get rid of the pain per se but it reduces the pain to nothing but an irritability."

Said Dr Chang: "They don't even use the word 'pain' ... they refer to every contraction as a 'surge'."

Ms Lim was part of a small but growing group of women who employ doulas, who number fewer than 20 in Singapore.

Ms Di Bustamante, the director of ParentLink, a company whose services include doula and pregnancy-related services, said the firm provides doula services for eight to 10 births a month, compared with five or six such births per month, two years ago.

About half her clientele are expats and half are locals, she said.

The numbers involved are still tiny, however. Since 2007, for example, KK Women's and Children's Hospital "has received two requests for the assistance of a doula, during delivery", according to Ms Paulin Koh, deputy director, nursing, at the hospital's delivery suite.

Ms Lim said: "In previous births, I had difficulty in getting what I wanted because I was in labour and (not in a fit state to) argue with doctors and nurses, and I wanted an advocate."

Ms Lim said her "advocate", the doula, Ms Phang, advised on matters such as when to lie down and when to walk around, and when to go to the hospital when labour had advanced. "When you're pushing the baby out, someone will, invariably, in all the births, say something like 'Shut up and push!' I will usually tell the nurse, 'you shut up'. Now I have Ginny helping me to glare at her," she quipped.

Having the kind of birth they want - which often excludes pain relief - is important for clients of doulas. "

Some doctors don't even allow birth plans. We often have people switching to us because they can't have a birth plan," said Ms Wolff, who, besides being a doula, is also a trained nurse and midwife.

For Ms Lim, as with many people who opt for doulas, having a natural, drug-free birth was crucial, especially after her unhappiness over her second son, Rupert, having to be delivered via an emergency Caesarean section six years ago.

"I felt that birthing, like eating or sleeping ... or having sex, should be something that your body is designed to do. I wanted to have a natural birth. I felt that this is the normal way to give birth," she said, in contrast to "interventionist" societal norms regarding childbirth.

In opting to give birth without drugs, Ms Lim is in a distinct minority. With regard to the women who give birth at Singapore General Hospital (SGH), for example, "over 90 per cent opt for pain relief", according to Dr Tan Lay Kok, senior consultant at SGH's department of obstetrics and gynaecology. The three forms of pain medication commonly used are epidurals, pethidine injections and Entonox gas.

"In Singapore, all births are pretty much looked at as requiring medical attention ... a medical event, not a normal physiological event," said Ms Bustamante, a doula herself, stating views similar to other doulas'. Citing the use of painkiller drugs as an example of a medicalised approach, she added: "Some doctors want to release the membranes, break the waters routinely, halfway through labour."

Asked separately by Weekend Today whether obstetricians in Singapore were generally too interventionist in childbirth, Dr Tan of SGH said: "Obstetricians have their patients' and their babies' best interests at heart. It is in this context that any intervention is discussed with the patient, taking into account both maternal and fetal considerations, and assessing the pros and cons of the intervention."

Dr Tan added: "Labour is usually managed actively in hospitals, and if the progress of labour is slow, the obstetrician may suggest breaking the waters to help augment the uterine contractions."

Ms Bustamante also said: "Many doctors require that women give birth on the bed on her back. This position is not conducive to an easy birth. It fights gravity and can cause perineum tearing."

She added that "using a birth stool, squatting, (being on) all fours, even standing are much better positions as this allows the pelvis to open an additional 30 per cent".

Asked separately about which birthing position is best, Professor Chong Yap Seng of National University Hospital (NUH), said that would depend on the individual; it would be "the position that you feel most able to push when you're in the second stage of labour".

"The training all over the world is like this: Most doctors are trained with an active management mindset. Some of the policies may seem a bit too cautious to laymen," he said, in reference to queries about medical intervention in childbirth.

However, as doctors are privy to "very bad outcomes" that may occur even with normal pregnancies, "we actually like to err on the side of caution", said Prof Chong, senior consultant at NUH's department of obstetrics and gynaecology.

Whichever birthing method women choose, there is perhaps one universal constant in all new births. In 30 years of nursing, "I've seen thousands of deliveries", said Ms Wolff, "newborn babies always look like their fathers." She reckons it's a way for fathers to bond with their new babies, even though their children's features will soon shift and change.

- TODAY/sc

I contacted Ms Ginny Phang to find out more about hypnobirthing and she was very prompt in answering my questions. I was thinking if I should go for a intensive course on hypnobirthing (given that I am into full term and I might go into delivery anytime soon) - even if I don't go for water birth, it would probably help in relieving some pain during delivery.

According to her, she has worked with Dr Paul Tseng and Dr Lai Fon-Min at Mount Alvernia on water birth.

I checked with my gynae and he was not into water birth as he believes the more "established, traditonal methods". Of course, he also shared the pros and cons of water birth with me but he mentioned that if I am really keen on water birth, he could refer me to doctors who are practicing it. 

In the end, I decided that I don't want to go through the stress of having to go for an intensive course and water birth. I was thinking if I had more time, I would probably have signed up. For now, feeling relaxed is my top agenda. Anyway, now I just gotta count on my breathing techniques I learnt during parentcraft lessons and hubby's support (to remind and reassure me!) during the delivery.

Weird Habit?

Does any mummy has the weird habit of smelling your bolster while sleeping?

I have actually stopped after I went to high school but I discover that the smell (er, not to sound too yucky but is your own unique smell la) seems to helps to soothe my nausea feeling in my 1st trimester and currently the Braxton Hicks contractions which I have been experiencing more lately. To put it simply, it's like your "smelly pillow" (臭臭)  one might have during the childhood days.

I hope I am not the only weird mummy. =}

Coconut Juice II

This is my 4th (and final) week of drinking young coconut juice.

Seems like hub has learnt how to chop the coconut:

1. Use a scissors to cut/scrape off the husk so as to expose it
2. Once you see an small opening (between the husk and the white flesh lining), use a knife to knock it and lift the husk up.
3. 5 mins -done !

If really all else fails, just get it off the drinks store at the food centre.

So now is like counting down to the D-elivery day. hmm.

Food Cravings List II

A follow up to my previous post :

1. Cha-Siew Ramen
2. Mee Siam
3. Mee Rebus
4. Ayam Penyet
5. Chicken mushroom pie/puff
6. Kuay Zup
7. Roast Pork rice
8. Subway sandwiches
9. Pear
10. Assorted cookies